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Teen Writers Critique Group

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Teen Writers Critique Group

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Teen Writers Critique Group

Teen Writers Critique Group


4 posters

    A crazy novel idea I had

    Mac
    Mac
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    A crazy novel idea I had Empty A crazy novel idea I had

    Post by Mac Sun Oct 23, 2011 11:32 pm

    Hi all!
    I swear, I had such a CRAZY novel idea the other day. I might do it for NaNo actually. Anyway, I thought it was good enough to keep as I could get something decent out of it.

    I know it needs a LOT of work, but do tell me what you think. (It might not be your thing either... not that I've read many novels on terrorists)
    (These names aren't their names, I just made them up)




    Two people, Trey and Alex are 15 and 16 respectively. The two of them absolutely detest each other and would very much like to see the other dead - to the point where they would kill each other if it was legal and they could sneak in knives to school - although the metal detectors would catch them.

    Suddenly, Xavier, disappears. Trey, Alex and a few other people are the only people who knew about his whereabouts in the final hours before his disappearance. Alex is extremely worried about his best friend, particularly when he hears strange rumours. Soon, Trey's sister disappears. The two make a deal with each other - if one helps find the other's "person", it'll happen vice versa....(so if Alex helps Trey find his sister, Trey'll help Alex find Xavier).

    Meanwhile, strange things are going on through out the whole of London. A sudden spate of terrorist attacks shake the city. These terrorists have kidnapped Xavier and Trey's sister and are threatening to commit more kidnaps, attacks etc if their demands aren't met (I don't know what they want yet). They develop the Domino effect - nothing to do with the Cold War and communism, unlike your History teacher might say - if you explode one car, that car will make the ones next to it explode... etc etc. Traffic Jams and whole streets are destroyed.

    As more teenagers are kidnapped (deliberately teenagers and children), Trey and Alex are closer to meeting some of the terrorists demands when Xavier manages to call Alex (don't ask how this works) and tells him the approximate area of his location. Trey, sadly for Alex, finds out and accompanies Alex to try and free the hostages because the 'kidnappers' aren't there - don't ask either. Now, remember how Alex wanted Trey dead? He's got his chance now...


    I'm sure you loved that terrible mess xD I'll try and include a lot on the psychological bits. I've got some ideas such as a non-English speaking kid calls them (still dunno how it'll work) but the terrorists didn't expect them to have a phone because they're so young.

    What do you think and do you have any ideas to try and solve this jigsaw? XD
    dotandscribble
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    Post by dotandscribble Mon Oct 24, 2011 2:47 pm

    I like it! Would it be easier for him to text him? I'm just thinking that most teens are good at subtly texting when therye not meant to ( which I'm doing now :p) just a thought
    Mac
    Mac
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    Post by Mac Mon Oct 24, 2011 4:04 pm

    Thanks! I'll not be writing it for a very long time though Razz

    That's a good idea Smile Merci!
    Tia
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    Post by Tia Mon Oct 24, 2011 8:23 pm

    Hello, Mac!
    I love this idea - I really do. And I usually don't like reading thriller-y, terrorist-y, bomb-y stuff, but I would very happily read this Very Happy To be brutally honest, I like it better than your current novel idea XD I like how you have two mortal enemies as the two protagonists - it's a unique approach, and I can't recall reading something like that before.
    The only concern I have is this - how much they hate each other. They need to have strong, and I mean very strong, justified reasons for hating each other so badly. It can't be just because Alex stole Trey's girlfriend or whatever. I mean, they are only teenagers and don't have a grown man's:
    a) brutality or ability to kill (remember, they're kids, stuff like this shakes us up) Unless they maybe grew up in a bad part of town and are used to robberies and killings?
    b) longer life. In a short span of time you've got to think up enough believable reasons for them to hate each other so much. With more years, you have more time to form grudges.
    But, if you manage to pull it off, you've got two brilliant MCs.

    Anyway, for the loopholes, I like Dot's texting idea, but how would he get the phone? It's unlikely that someone just drops it in front of him, so maybe he, by sheer chance, sees someone he knows and somehow signals something to him/her? Or, working on your language idea, Xavier sees his old babysitter, or aunt, or anyone, and calls out in Arabic or Chinese or whatever (basically in a language the kidnappers don't know) some plan for him/her to get his/her phone to him. For him/her to ‘drop’ their phone at a specific time. Maybe there's a specific time every day where the kidnappers disappear for a small amount of time (2 minutes tops) to, I don't know, update their boss or go out and get food for the children. But, Xavier signals to this relative in a way that the kidnappers think he's having a seizure or going mad (if it's a rough sounding language this will work wonderfully) so that they don't suspect anything.
    Whew. Thought of that just now. There's bound to be a thousand plot holes, but I hoped I at least gave you an idea XD
    Mac
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    Post by Mac Mon Oct 24, 2011 10:04 pm

    Thanks a billion Tia! Very Happy

    Yeah, every new novel idea I have I prefer to the last one. My first - Terrorists kidnapping someone and in search of independence for their colony (BAAASICALLY a rip off from Noughts & Crosses), second, the Egyptian President wanting to reclaim power, third, this.

    Throughout the book, Trey warms up to Alex and hates him less and less until near the end where he actually wonders why he hated Alex. Alex only appears to like him better until he locks him in the room for the terrorists to get at him >Smile

    But why would two people hate each other that much?
    Tia
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    Post by Tia Mon Oct 24, 2011 10:39 pm

    So far, I think this book idea is the best idea.

    Eh, I don't have any ideas why'd they hate each other that much. I'm too tired now. I'll sleep on it, and give you some stuff I come up with tomorrow. But this is what I meant, why it's going to be so hard to find a good reason - I mean, you're the author, and you still don't have a clear idea XD Maybe an old family feud or something like that?
    Mac
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    Post by Mac Tue Oct 25, 2011 1:46 pm

    I'm still not sure but I think it'd be more realistic if they two just hate each other and want each other badly hurt. Perhaps for revenge, but I think it'd be better and more realistic that way Smile

    To do this for NaNo or to not? NaNoWriMo's 6 days and 12 hours away so is that (well actually 13 hours as the clocks go back this week) too close? I'm worried I'll forget about rewriting the Diamond Fist...
    (I think I'll post ^ on the NaNo thread)
    Maris
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    Post by Maris Sat Dec 24, 2011 12:31 pm

    I like this idea. Did you start writing it?
    Mac
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    Post by Mac Sat Dec 24, 2011 2:06 pm

    I did a bit for NaNo and then ditched it. I've changed this one into dystopia and I'm not sure where I'm going with it, but It's on my mind. But it's now dystopia and post-apocalyptic. I even drew maps ^_^
    Maris
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    Post by Maris Sun Dec 25, 2011 12:51 pm

    Sounds cool Smile

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